Transform Your Leadership with these 4 Coaching Styles

This is a written Transcription for the Leadership Hustle episode about Transform Your Leadership with these 4 Coaching Styles, from Season 1 Episode 36.

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Transcript:

Andrea Fredrickson: In this episode of The Leadership Hustle, we'll discuss the four different types of coaching and why each one matters. Hello and welcome to The Leadership Hustle for executives whose companies are growing fast and need leaders who are ready. Welcome back to the Leadership Hustle. Um, I'm Andrea Fredrickson, and Michelle is with me again. So we are doing a second part of a series on coaching. And so I just want to tell a story about a situation that happened recently with an executive I was coaching. And in that scenario, he and I were just having a conversation about a situation. One of his employees, uh, approached him and was asking him a question, and he was puzzled by by what was being asked. And I said, okay, so what did you do? Well, I asked them a question. What did you do already? And then what? Like what did you say? He said, well, then I just gave him an answer. I said, is that really coaching? Is that really like, do you just he they he asked the question and you gave the answer after they told you what they had done already. And so, you know, that was how long was that that situation. You know, that was a really short situation. Right. That was like is that is that coaching? And so we got into a discussion about, you know, there are different types of coaching. And so I thought this, you know, we thought we were talking about, you know, as we were talking about putting these episodes together, that there really are four types of coaching. You know, there's probably, you know, yes, there's probably more, but there's four that we encounter a lot. Yes, in the business world. And yeah, we're not talking about baseball, we're not about softball, we're not about track or running or anything like that.

Michelle Hill: Or feeling necessarily feelings.

Andrea Fredrickson: Right? Right. Um, but we're talking about this whole concept of helping someone gain information so that ultimately they can improve whatever performance they're trying to to achieve or they need to achieve for the sake of the business or the team or things like that. So let's let's go. Let's dive into these coaching. Um, go through what, what. Like let's go through the top ones first. Like I want you to say yes.

Andrea Fredrickson: So what are the different types of coaching.

Michelle Hill: Yes I knew you'd ask me on that one. And I'm gonna flip it back to you. What are the different types of okay okay.

Andrea Fredrickson: All right. So, um, we have four that we come up with, right? So I just want to make sure I don't miss any. So I put them on my notes. All right. Okay. So, um, when there needs to be correction so someone's not doing something the way policy procedures, system machine works, something needs to be corrected.

Michelle Hill: And I like to elaborate on that one that it's it's because it's a procedure that needs to be done exactly this way. So there's procedure and there's preference.

Andrea Fredrickson: Right.

Michelle Hill: Right, right.

Andrea Fredrickson: Okay.

Michelle Hill: So it's it's it's they don't need to be corrected if it's a preference. Let's wait to see what results are getting unless we start seeing some red flags. Right, right. It's the they're out. They've there's a procedure that we need to follow. There's a.

Andrea Fredrickson: Document. There is a it is recorded the way it's supposed to be. And that's what we're supposed to do. Yes. Checklist something right. Yes. Okay. Second is there's coaching as it relates to problem solving and or brainstorming. So what is that like? Give me a give us a start with well.

Michelle Hill: When we think about coaching for that problem solving or brainstorming, it's it's again engaging them to think differently, engaging them to think, uh, about what their ideas are, how do they want to handle it, what you know, from their past experiences or things they've observed or done in the past, from maybe some things that they've learned? What are those? What ideas do they have? Right, right, right.

Andrea Fredrickson: There's a lot of times that this happens in our office, a lot where someone has a question and it's like, so how would you handle this? Right? And that happens between all of us. So it's not even an authority responsibility as it relates to coaching. It is just really brainstorming. But we're learning there's not Andreas way or Michelle's way or Christie's way or somebody else's way. It's. So what would you do in this scenario? So let's talk through it and just think through it. And so we're doing this coaching right. And so whoever owns the information can can move on with that. All right. The third one that I have listed here is when they are having an impact on someone else and they don't realize it. It's not working. Right. Yes. So, like, how does that like, how do you even start that conversation or where do you go with that.

Michelle Hill: Well, so just to kind of let's put it into perspective here, let's ah, an example, let's say that we are in a, we've got our eight people in a meeting and we're, we're discussing some things and you've got an individual who's very smart, uh, always has ideas and always shares them. Right. And then you have an individual who is also very smart, uh, but, um, and has ideas, but because there is a fear that if they have an idea that's different than the other person because that other person is a very strong, dominant personality and maybe even gets defensive if people disagree with them and they might not realize it. It's facial expressions or tone or uh, and they don't necessarily listen to understand. They just defend their idea. Right? They can condition some people in that room to shut down and not share. Right. And then so then when we're trying to brainstorm or solve a problem, it's always this one person's idea more often than it is the rest of the group. And, you know, do I believe a person is, you know, trying to create that environment? I, I don't think intentionally. I think it's a blind spot and not recognizing that impact and, and also not recognizing the power of different perspectives and how we can actually get better results if we're allowing others to talk. Well, that's an example.

Andrea Fredrickson: And we have and we have people who simply want to prove themselves correct. And so by let me blurt out the response, let me put that information out there and be very animated or very passionate about something. Right. And they don't realize that what else is going on. And so not emotionally aware. Yeah.

Michelle Hill: So that impact it's it's it's how we respond. It's it's our behaviors and how people perceive them, um, and feel as a result of it. And if we have people that don't feel because of different personalities, some people just don't feel safe. Some people feel very uncomfortable. Um, you're you might not feel unsafe or uncomfortable, but they do and we don't recognize it. It's kind of there's situations where two people might two people might have very strong personalities and they debate, I'm going to call it debate. They kind of bicker, argue back and forth. Right. You may have another personality in that room that that freaks them out. It's like we just want everyone to get along and we can't, you know. Harmony. Yes. And, um, that even though they're not in the discussion or the debate, they can just be sitting at the table. They can start dreading going to those meetings. They can start. They will feel very unsafe when that conversations elevate. They can, you know, and people, the two people maybe haven't it don't even recognize that the people there's a person or others in the room that are like this is uncomfortable for me. And now they don't contribute. I mean, it's a it's a negative ripple effect to how they feel about going to that meeting or meetings with the two of you, you know, moving forward. And so that's that, that impact. But again, I think going along the lines of believing people have good intentions, they just don't recognize or realize that that impact is not positive. Right.

Andrea Fredrickson: And the fourth one we have listed is when people need to be developed. So let's talk about the examples that come along with that.

Michelle Hill: Well. And so development that I think aligns with that growth mindset where it's we're wanting people to feel safe on that development piece where we're conditioning or not conditioning necessarily, but we are talking about how we all can be growing, whether it's intentional because this person is in a stage or they're new or they're learning something new, uh, but it's also wanting them to feel safe and realize that we all need to grow to get better in our roles. Right? And, uh, but that may be a little more structured depending on what it is we're developing. Okay. So it's depends is is this more of a how to use something development. Um, you know, how to actually physically do something or is it more of a soft skill development, a hard skill, soft skill development? Because those both are extremely valuable. Uh, it's they may look a little different in, in those steps on that development.

Andrea Fredrickson: Right. Even though we said earlier we're not talking about, you know, sports and things like that. There's a development coaching that comes that we a lot of times will equate to sports or music or singing. You know, we're just, you know, giving people new skills or adjusting things to become become better. And I think that we can do those same kinds of things in our day to day leadership responsibilities. Um, whether we're talking leader, talking to, um, an individual contributor of some way or a team member, you know, we we typically can give them developmental coaching and hopefully they're, um, part of their annual reviews, you know, are part of those. But please don't wait till an annual review to help people learn and develop. But those are pretty comfortable because what it's not doing is really correcting someone. They're simply saying, okay, so what's next? And people are typically energized by that. Not everyone, but typically energized by that.

Michelle Hill: Yeah, I mean, most people want I mean majority personalities. They want new and exciting. They want new things to learn. They just at a different they may all have a different pace, speed and and um, timeline timing is going to be important as well. That may be different, but people want that. And I think if you if they have development goals like what what do they want to work on this year that then allows you to delegate, you can pull back and go, okay, this individual wants to learn how to do ABC. This one wants to do X, y, z. Very specifically. What are the things that I do or someone else on our team does that we could give them an opportunity to work on right. And to whether it's do it temporarily or maybe they they take it on permanently because, you know, person A who wants to learn ABC is um, is going to be something that person B does really well all the time. And person B has something they want to learn. Well, let's have person B delegate to person A.

Andrea Fredrickson: To be the backup.

Michelle Hill: Yeah. And what ever you want to call it. But it's really about their development. And so they, they there's a cross training event that can occur. And then there's other person B who is now delegating some responsibilities to a peer can then learn new things as well. So they don't get kind of feeling, I'm not growing right, right. And I don't know or I don't have time to grow because I've you've given me all these things to learn. And now I do them really well and I don't have an opportunity to learn new things. And so we have to we have to shift stuff around to help people.

Andrea Fredrickson: So, so developing people from a tactical or project kinds of thing is, um, is a very typical development process, right? That's like people inside of organizations. If there are trainers inside the organization, they're really related to some of the tactical things that come along with that. There's also a developmental process where it's like, how do I be a really good team player? How do I communicate in a way that people understand better how you know what's going on? This kind of delves into into impact a little bit, but it's also a little bit of how do I take on higher level role responsibilities. And a lot of that stuff isn't necessarily tactical. Correct. And so we've got to make sure that we're coaching from from a perspective of tactical and social or behavioral and what's what's going on. Okay. So we have these four. We have correction. We have um problem solving or brainstorming. We have um improving the impact or the, um, the social relationships that we have with folks. And we have developmental in my opinion, in my experience, people do a the best jobs, not great jobs, but the best jobs. And this is a process that needs to be corrected. We need to fix that right now. Give them that feedback because it's it's not so much, um, a feeling. It's a I'm just coaching to the black and white. I'm coaching. Coaching to a process. To a process. Right? Yes, yes. Brainstorming happens pretty naturally if the person coaching remembers not just to give them answers, but to think out loud with people. Ask questions. What about this? How about this? Oh, I wonder what would happen if we did this. You know, those kinds of conversations are pretty natural. If you create a culture where people are collaborative. Yes. And then when it comes to developmental, because many organizations have succession plans or we need somebody to cover for something, whether it's a vacation or somebody's going to have has a leave or something like that, we do a little bit better in some of those areas. The one people really, really struggle with is impact. Yes. What do you think?

Michelle Hill: Oh, 100%, 100%. They they struggle in impact. Uh, and I think it's it gets back to that is going to now involve me having to give you feedback on something that I've observed. And then it's also my perspective And when, you know, when we give feedback, the a lot of that the science is showing that fear center of our brain lights up. It lights up for both the receiver and the giver. So it doesn't matter which side of the table you're on, right? People get scared. And then we we need to help ensure that we are with ourselves, staying calm and managing those emotions and also that other person because we need them to be open, to listen and to think and to really identify what can they do differently. And, and that whole what they can do differently. Again, that has to go back to how do they what do they want to adjust, what's going to be important to them because it's it's going to be in their communication. It's going to be in either too much, not enough facial expression, the body language, the tone. Um, you know, it's it's it's that social interaction and, uh, that, that they've got to own that.

Andrea Fredrickson: So this is the place where we're helping someone reveal, in most cases, blind spots or which means they're probably doing something unintentionally.

Michelle Hill: Oh, yes, 100%.

Andrea Fredrickson: Or if someone is doing something intentionally that the true impact that that is having on the people around them. And I would say if leaders of others are not having those conversations, you've got a virus inside your organization, right? You've got a person who's really having healthy. It's not as healthy. And that's typically when organizations bring in a third party to do the coaching, because we're taking away the fear from the coach, right? Because we're going to what? What in our scenario, what we do is we gather this information through interviews to find out what impact people are having on others perception, not just the one thing that was the straw that broke the camel's back, per se. Right? But it really is, you know, what are the other things that are happening? There's probably a series of things that are happening, and so we can give that feedback anonymously or from their peers and from the others in an anonymous way. And then they're not saying, well, I know who said that. It's like, nope, it's because it's it's not going to be just one person and it's going to be set up in a way. But really then we can say, okay, think about this. Do you want to change this? Because I don't have any authority over you.

Andrea Fredrickson: Right. And or you know, and so how if they say, I don't want to fix that, it's like, okay, understand there are consequences to yes, I do want to fix this. And no, I don't. Yes. And um, if you do want to fix that, then not only are we going to say, okay, how do I fix it, but what are the tools, what are the techniques, what are the perspectives? And we don't have someone. We don't have someone say, yeah, but I, I'm going to use that on my performance evaluation. What you just told me, right? Yes. This is not going to happen on that. So so there are places for the leader of the employee to have that impact. Coach. Like some things are pretty simple, right? When you don't respond to emails within 48 hours, people think you didn't care. They don't you you are lazy. You know all that, all those kinds of things. That's an impact conversation. That's coaching. It's like, so what do we need to do so that they don't have that impression, right. Versus the scenario you mentioned where you're observing maybe the CEO or a high level executive in a meeting, and they're responding in ways that are shutting other people down.

Andrea Fredrickson: And like why don't people talk? It's because you talk too much. You know, it's more than that. But right, right. And so how do how do we do that? So, you know, I really think that just being intentional about why you're coaching, yes. Is is the key to this and recognizing there there are other kinds of coaching. But the big four that we've recognized is we need to fix something, right. We need to fix your technique or your method or the step that you're doing. Because it's a process. Because it's a process, not a preference. Let's do some brainstorming without just blurting out answers so people can own their answer. They can own the decision of what to do next, right? That that people need to have feedback on how they are impacting positively or negatively Their team, the the other members of the company, those that they lead in some cases, or maybe even the boss themselves. Right. They need to understand that and how can they become better at that? And lastly, that isn't are they intentionally developing their people not just on a a social side, but on technique, on communication, on, um, leadership skills.

Michelle Hill: It's it's the developing on that next level. And not to say that there's a promise or guarantee that they're going to be promoted, but if they desire to grow in that organization, that's that development. Well, I mean, there could be development just to get good at their job. Right? Okay. So once they're good at their job, let me fix that. Once they're good at their job, then it transitioned into where are. You know, and what is that future? What's next. Right. And okay. If that's next, if you want to start showing people that you are ready for that if that opportunity arises. Right. These are some things that we need you to work on. Or I like to ask the question, what do you think you need to work on? You know, what do you believe this this director level position entails? What does it involve versus not. Because then now you can like okay, what are those things you feel you're really good at versus what are those things that there's growth and that gets in the development piece.

Andrea Fredrickson: It does, it does. So be intentional. That's the message. Very right. Yes. If you're looking for more resources related to developing leaders, we have links in the show notes. And don't forget to hit subscribe so you never miss another episode.